Intimacy from the Inside Out - an overview:

I like to tell my students that I've been a couple's therapist since I was four years old.  I have early memories of paying close attention to my parents' dynamics, trying to figure out what they might do differently to make themselves happier.

IFS therapy helped me release that four year old from her relentless and unforgiving job as a therapist.  She was replaced with an ability to trust my clients and myself; to have more Self-presence, genuine curiosity, and spaciousness in my approach.  

The seeds of Intimacy from the Inside Out® began to grow over the years as I applied the guiding principles of the IFS to my work with couples. I started asking people to pay attention to two processes simultaneously: one, to make a turn inward, bringing curiosity and presence to their own relational wounding, actively healing the past.  Two, to remain mindful of and connected to their partner, who was, perhaps in the same process. I was able to offer couples ways to do their own personal work, but remain connected and in relationship at the same time.  Gradually a system developed through which couples could unburden the past and access their own inherent ability to connect, bond and provide lovingly attuned behavior for themselves and their partners simultaneously.  From this state of mind, hard conversations are easier and solutions to difficult issues are more attainable.

In 2009 I finished a many year process of thinking, writing and designing an 80-hour training for IFS therapists who want to learn to work with couples in this way.  The first training was offered in Boston that year.  I now offer it in several cities across the country and am also available to facilitate experiential retreats for couples interested in exploring how Intimacy from the Inside Out® can bring aliveness, hope and meaningful change to their relationships.

Please see the Schedule page for details.